#now im thinking about what the elite would be oh god
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this is so niche and random thought at 1 am but if kenny and ibushi were in lotr, what would they be?
#kenny omega#kota ibushi#golden lovers#personally i can’t decide if ibushi would be elf or a hobbit#i could see kenny as a dwarf or even a skin changer…hmmm#now im thinking about what the elite would be oh god#i just wanna draw them in a fun little lotr au or maybe even write something……
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a comprehensive list of everything wrong with hazbin hotel.
quick note before i lose myself in madness, my standards for helluvaboss are non existent because its a free show on youtube. also i kinda like helluvaboss and i will indulge in any bias i damn well please.
oh and spoilers. i guess.
the greater narrative of the entire season is "White lady civilize inner city hoodlum". ex: The blind side. rich girl, affluent family yadda yadda.
the story is set up to be like amphibia, owl house, svtfoe, steven universe, that being starting as something episodic then transforming into story driven narrative. why? because we know the benefits and drawbacks, episodic starts allows us to wander the world, it allows us to understand the dynamics, we are not forced to reckon with anything because there is no deadline. characters are allowed to bloom and shine and the audience can actually get attached.
the source material is Vary Clearly formed from remnants of something out of a middle school edgelord narrative. the usage of transformation, the big spooky grins, the "and then i smile as my eyes glow and-"-isms which in most cases i don't mind because in some instances but in a vary Particular case its astoundingly annoying and that annoyance is like a mold, shit spreads quick.
the color Red. as a lover of homestuck cherubs and karkat and aradia, as someone who fucking loves the color red, it is so painful to say but holy shit tone it the fuck down, i know its hell but their are so many other colors that you can use, its everywhere, the streets, the air, the windows, the screens, the characters, i know the pride ring is represented with red but change up the palates every so often for backgrounds
the rush, this ties into the second point made but i think the story itself is rushed. we know everything way to early. i know way to much and it makes it hard to care about anything because im still trying to digest the last chunk of info. "oh ok, so they clear out hell once a year. oh hell has a heaven embassy? ok. oh that adam the angel, i though he wou- oh its every 6 months now. wait the exterminators die a lot? then why is everyone sca- people in hell already have weapons that can kill angels? w- oh we are in heaven now, ok ma- no one in heaven except for the elites know the exterminations occur? how do-" and its that, just this incessant rush to explain everything to you. notably that's just the god damn spark notes, we need to know everything about the characters now, every single bit of their story, their insecurities, what charlie needs to fix, how she can fix them, the major bad guys, everything. you are never allowed to dwell on a character because we need to rush towards something else. it almost feels like this should have been like... season three, it would have been a fantastic season three if you dropped the introductions honestly.
the concept of redemption. for a story of redemption to work you need to look at three things. What is there crime, Do they want to change, What is preventing them from changeing? there is only one single character that has a notable path of redemption, angel dust, but if you look through their story it feels off. What Exactly is he guilty of? he has sex, does drugs and drinks. his apparent nymphomania is tied to his sad backstory as someone forced into the sex industry so how is that their fault? then if you think about it you start to spiral and notice "hey why are most of these people in hell?" like sure some of them may deserve punishment but then you see the fucking dichotomy and its like "I was a inventor in england and died of the fucking plague, i may have made evil little contraption hoohoohoo" vs "I was a cannibal, a full on cannibal, i fucking killed people and ate them and then someone shot me". ONE OF THESE THINGS ARE A LITTLE MORE FUCKING EXTREME. i'm going to go fucking nuts, the thing they went to heaven with when presenting a case to angels on the idea that redemption and becoming a better person is actually real was angel dust not drinking at a party and not having sex with consenting adults and i want to go fucking insane. WHAT IS THE CRIME, WHO IS THROWING THE BOOK, WHAT DOES THE BOOK INTEL, ARE WE ON GOOD PLACE RULES?! half the cast dont Need redemption they need fucking help, and the other half of the cast do need redemption but they do not seek it making the point moot. sir pentious acts like he has the brain of a hyper intelligent toddler tossing about toys, its almost like he did his one bad thing of spying and then got caught, sank his little diddy about forgiveness and second chances and become a null point through out the rest of the series, sure their was Some weight to him sacrificing himself, he was a decently funny character and he had good moments but him popping up in heaven felt like a fore gone conclusion, he didn't deserve to be in hell so why do i care that he is suddenly in heaven? because its working on the concept the good place already made. no one actually deserves eternal punishment they just need help processing what makes them a dick, but instead of looking at all the parts of the afterlife that make it bad, inefficient and then creating and trying ideas to see if it work instead over a few seasons, we crash dick first into all the major plot points in regards to that and say "tada, we fixed it.".
having a sub-plot about sexual assault and its victims then having multiple sexual assault related gag ruins your point.
don't make a bunch of stereotypically jewish characters into cannibals, that was a big thing, really shouldn't have to say it.
if you are going to make a character black, make them black, you can say alastor was black but sweet seren-fucking-dippity that's not a black man.
pot meet kettle but yeah the cursing could be a little less liberal. maybe just blue hair or the pronouns, not both.
there is a very distinctive art deco/jazz aesthetic which normally i love but i feel as though it is not used to its full extent and in some cases really hurts the character design in and of itself.
this is a vary obvious bit but the story is a million times more interested in gay men then it is of lesbians, which culminates in this insane thing where the writers clearly have more talent or perhaps it would be more abt to say practice writing male gay pining then they are with lesbian pining. which i personally think is hilarious because i did not know you could min max fujoshi-ism that hard.
this next section is more to do with each character on a fundamental level, for the sake of brevity whatever there is left, i'm just doing ones with speaking roles.
13. Charlie:
(see what i mean about that red thing?)
as originally stated charlie fits rather comfortably into every white saviour narrative, though that seems to be part of her joke. though i'm not entirely sure how much of a joke it can be when its rewarded and expected to advance the plot.
her character design says nothing, it has the motif of old puppets or dolls, she wears something vaguely similar to service suits, her demonic form is just some extra horns.not to say every character needs to have their life on a clothes rack but some more snake and goat imagery would be nice
its not the chol design of charlie with snake hair, not an actual problem but its a problem to me, damn you @cholvoq for ruining my ability to look at any of the characters without wishing i was seeing your designs instead.
character wise aside from the white savoir bit, i'm having a bit of trouble understanding what the arc of the character is. she is shown to be naive, someone who doesn't understand how the world works but everytime she says something its something astoundingly clear like "people can actually get better". and its treated like someone demanded faygo in every water fountain. is the joke that the world around her to cynical or is so to naive? please pick one or the other.
now if you know me, you know i fucking hate overpowered characters with a blinding passion, one that would set alit the god damn abyss but in this one special instance, i feel like its warranted, she's the direct descendant of fucking God, she can swing her weight around a little, i mean god damn. she in so many instances looks like shes cowering so often, why would the daughter of lucifer get backed down by some rando pimp? why wasn't she the one to fight adam? sure you can say she is young but how young? her parents were there since pre-abrahamic times, most of the characters showed up in hell in the 1900s, some of them showed up in the 1600s, how old is charlie??? how long does it take for her to learn how to be strong? The story does not suffer if charlie is strong and knows she is strong. it can easily be a case of "i don't believe in violence to a weird degree". fit it into her apparent naivety about the world to believe that violence is never the answer even when dealing with a being that is unilaterally horrible and abusive and monstrous.
she ga- no im kidding, i do think her romance was waysided a bit, it would have been fine to have more scenes of them togather and in love you know?
14. Vaggie
why did you name the lesbian vaggie...? Don't do that maybe?
I like how her design is almost moth like but again i feel as though you could have amped that up.
she feels as though someone tried to combine undyne and pearl from steven universe, same story beats and design elements. it makes it hard to really distinguish her as a character.
i honestly dont have much to say about her. she is fine.
christ kill me, lets just get the big one out of the way
15. Alastor.
God Damn
where to start.
"alastor is mixed race" mixed with fucking what? concrete? there is not a single black feature on that creature, now im not saying you have to make him a png of louie armstrong but it wouldn't hurt to add a curl to the hair maybe? make it a tiny bit more wavy? Something? a crumb i beg of thee?
his symbolism is all over the god damn place, native american monsters (you know the one), voodoo, radio, puppets, stitches, circuses??? and Tentacles i guess. two of those are from closed religions so if you dumped those you would actually get a more concise character focused on the concept of vox populi as a means of societal control and influence as we see in his first song. but again that gets drowned out repeatedly by all the other random toy box bits shoved into him.
tumblr sexy man bait
he serves no purpose in the story. he does spooky stuff, pretends to do things and then goes back to sitting around looking spooky. i understand that his motif is supposed to be aloof mastermind but maybe have him do more mastermindy things? if you remove most of alastors scenes, bar the songs, it doesn't change all to much. husk and nifity can still be at the hotel, they could be looking for outs in their contracts the same as angel dust. hell it even helps with the one scene where he dose some spooky shit, asking charlie for a favor in exchange for his help in the fight with the angels instead of asking him about angel weapons which should have remained a strictly vaggie scene.
his presence in a way delegitimize the story, as I noted in in the section regarding redemption, the three parts are "what is the crime, do they want to change, what is stopping them?" and alastor kinda just spits in the face of that. he is a serial killer cannibal that has no qualms about how evil he is and apparently must continue being evil due to being under the control under someone legitimately called the Root Of All Evil. show him take a slight interest in the idea that maybe shit for him could be better, make him Want Change at the bare fucking minimum or dont have him at the hotel.
his stupid little fucking horns, big shot the troll liker wants characters to have big fucking horns, make them noticeable or dont have them.
he looks more like a dog boy, which could have been an interesting thing with the collar motif but fuck me i guess.
personal pet peeve but i fucking hate characters that have a million plus powers, stick to a set number, be creative.
im getting more petty as i go on so last point: he could have been in less episodes, he didn't need to be in dad beat dad, that should have been just a lucifer and charlie episode. inverse the red and black and i think he would be fucking great color wise, his body type is the same as ten different characters, he isnt radio enough, aside from the voice and and staff if you told me he was the fucking Cat Demon i would have been just as convinced.
16. Angel Dust
what the fuck, gay spider? its hard to actully articulate all the thoughts i have on angel dust, not in the sense that he is a deeply thought provoking character but in the fact that there is not much meat on the bones.
all around i think angel dust is kinda middling. he has a decent enough romance with husk, he has a decent enough story line that revolves around battling addiction and removing yourself from an abuser (which the story tries to brand as "Redemption???")
I dont like that most of his jokes would qualify as sexual harassment, i don't mind him being sexual as a character but continuing on when clearly someone doesn't like the jokes hurts the character.
not a critique but he is pink, which honestly ill fucking take at point, as long as its not more fucking red.
i think his design is an improvement over some of the old vivzie designs but it feels like it could have done with going a few more rounds of design changes.
same thing with alastor, charlie and vaggie, there is not enough of the animal that they are supposed to be. You could have told me angel dust was a fucking bee or something and i would have had to believe you. nothing about angel dust initially says spider, hell he dosent even have enough limps to be a fucking spider.
17. Carmilla carmine
are... are you supposed to be a rabbit...?
Big Yoai Hands
ballet fighting style, could have been cool, wish she fought more like sanji or chun li.
A single mom that works to hard, who loves her kids and never stops-
her song was decent, not great, decent. it feels as though the actress has experience singing but not in the way they tried to make her sing during her two songs. they have a obvious mexican influence, honestly just let her sing in spanish in the english dub. go listen to the spanish dub, "out for love" sounds great in spanish.
i wish i had more thoughts on them, fucking rip.
18. cherri bomb
that's not a punk aesthetic that's 2010s alt
decent character, they showed up once or twice i guess, no real thoughts.
19. egg boiz
absolutely perfect, i have not notes on them, these are perfect creatures.
20. Emily
im so fucking happy to see a singular blue character
does the naive dreamer bit better then charlie
We really shouldnt have seen her until the end of season two or middle of three.
good contrast with the other angels on screen.
Wait she is supposed to be black??? Where???
21. Husk
keith david you absolute delight, Why on gods green earth did they only give you one singing part?
one of the few charecters where its clear husk is a cat, i do like the kinda... marquee design, he is a magic cat, thats neat. i still think you can toss the wings and eyebrows and still have just as good of a charecter.
has a deeply intresting story of someone who died as a nobody, became the fat cat of hell and then was forced back to the bottom by their own vices, not used at fucking all.
huge potential, little pay off.
22. lillith
I know nothing about her except she ditched her kid and husband to vacation in heaven and i think thats kinda funny.
alot of werid things floating around her, again she shouldnt have been shown in the show at all until next season.
23. lucifer morningstar
no notes, funniest charecter, did a song based on friend like me.
few notes: i do like the idea that the immortal symbol of pride is a constant emotional wreckage constantly seeking approval through grand showmanship and manic energy that threatens to take over anything they touch.
would have liked more snake stuff on him, maybe some more goat things like horns.
that is such a stupid fucking staff lmao.
24. Adam.
alex brightman you absolute fucking delight, you should have had more songs.
I wish his design was more focused on the idea of him being a glam rock wash up
I fucking hate his mask
We shouldn't have met him until the end of the season.
25. Niffty
again she is supposed to be a bug or cockroach but nothing about her points to that.
token straight
keeps rocketing back and fourth between sexulization and infantilization
you had kimiko glenn but didnt give her a single fucking song?
26. Sir Pentious
the secret season one redeemed.
the pilot version of him felt more like someone that could do a season one redemption arc, a megalomaniac constantly attempting territory grabs, there is something you can work with, actual character flaws to work through.
essentially a child after the first episode.
actually a snake which i appreciate.
no where near steampunky enough.
27. the villians of the show dont make much sense, each one feels like they should be season long deals on their own instead of a bunch of team rocket esque idiots that show up on occasion, do a bad thing and then leave.
28. Valentino
gOD THERE IS SO MUCH RED
only a moth some of the time.
sucks as a villain, maybe they need more screen time to show why they suck in a more substantial way aside from being told that he sucks.
it is interesting that angel dust is only under his magical control when in the studio, it shows that angel dust has to make a conscious choice to return, which in turn can be made to show how abusers can draw back their victims. I do not think it was done well in this circumstance as it shows him to be cartoonishly evil, constantly flying back and fourth between sweet and utter psycho, there is no actual reason for angel dust to ever actually go back to the studio, he just does so every so often.
29. Vox
legit who cares? the only thing about him that is in any way substantial is all the dope ass fan art we get.
propaganda machine angle that is not explored at all, just hinted at. no actual barring on the story whatsoever.
why didn't he try to do the same shit as alastor by the way? he knows its bad if alastor gets in good with charlie so shouldn't it be a ass kissing race?
same body shape as literally every other male character.
tumblr sexy man version of pyrocynicals fursona.
30. Valvette
the actual poster child of the shows huge problem of "Show me, don't tell me".
apparently the glue that holds the villains together. never shown.
apparently the one that makes the love potions that valentino is famous for. had to learn about that in the fuckin wiki trivias
we know so much about her from things outside of the show.
was there to call carmilla a coward, that's her plot contribution. she shows up every now and again but its never anything substantial and serves to more around take up run time for people We Don't Need To Know Yet.
im not trying to be mean, animation is animation, we need smaller studios to have success in the industry so that other indie studios can have that success, felling a tree makes it easier for others to follow. showing that its possible to number brain rot exacs helps all animators.
but this show has so much bullshit attached to it, it has so much fucking potential that it fries my brain with unyielding frustration.
this took a bit to write, im tired, thanks for reading.
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ITS ME ITS ME IM GLONK
I HAVE ANOTHER SIREN IDEA
So: i was learning about art forgery earlier this year, and my professor was mentioning how because of the elitism in the art world, some artists are forced to turn to forgery because no one will pay large amounts of money for art that doesn't have a famous name/history attached to it. SO they'll copy other people's artstyles and say they found this "Leonardo Da Vinci" work in some abandoned attic somewhere and sell it (now obviously because DaVinvi is so famous, it would be pretty hard to sell that lie, but you know what I mean. maybe a buttersworth painting. idk).
...And you can launder money with art forgeries: somebody could buy a forgery with money achieved through nefarious means (dirty money), then resell it for the same (or a higher) price. Now they have the same amount/more money, but it was achieved through legitimate means so its harder to track down/make a case against it in court.
Anyway: The Syndicate catches some broke ass college student on their territory, but they are a damn quick thinker and say that they have connections in crime to spare themselves. The student tells them that they have contact with this guy Anonymous, who provides art forgeries that the Syndicate can then sell and keep their money trail clean (especially useful, when in their civilian disguise. all that money is suspicious...). What the student ISN'T telling them is that they aren't just the middleman for Anonymous' works, they ARE Anonymous (because, if the Syndicate got sick of them and knew that there was only just one person involved in the business, they could just kill that one person. But if they think there's multiple, they'd have to keep the student alive to get to Anonymous).
Maybe Siren finds out that its the student who is doing the paintings, and they bond over their artistic interests; him being a musician, them being a painter.
Or, ALTERNATE SCENARIO: There IS a mafia that the Syndicate is dealing with, and the mafia agrees to set them up with one of their greatest contributors. Obviously Siren is sent to talk with this mysterious associate-- since he's very persuasive-- and instead of finding some shady, powerful crimelord, he finds a worn out, paint-splattered college student wearing J O R T S in a shitty apartment. they don't even react when they see him they're just used to it at this point.
i might un-anonymize myself soon idk
GLONK YOUR BRAIN IS HUGE OH MY GOD
firstly, always feel free to spam my inbox with ideas, they make me happy to see and i love coming home or having a minute to read through them and reading it like the daily paper, it’s my favorite part of the day
secondly!!!!! AHHHH okay the whole thing abt hiding the fact that this broke college student is actually like an amazing art dealer and like potentially dangerous is so juicy. like
student: “yeah, Anonymous is crazy. they once stabbed someone and used their blood to sign a painting because it was the only color they could get to match a specific red tone that Van Gogh used” knowing damn well it was actually their own blood because they cut their finger opening up a box of new paints, causing the red to splatter on the floor
siren: “wow… this Anonymous person must be dangerous. how are you so calm around them? not to sound rude… but you dont strike me as the fighting type”
student: *think fast think fast, i cant let them know i make most of the forgeries or that i am Anonymous* “we’re lovers”
siren: “what.”
i feel like techno would be the first one to figure it out, and wilbur would be dead last. techno knew the minute he met you but just kept quiet about it, phil realized when he monitored your activity for a day and noticed how you’d be mimicking famous artists, tommy realized because student told him, and wilbur didn’t believe it for a second until he literally showed up to a meeting Anonymous had set up, watched as they tried to kidnap them, resulting in their mask being knocked off and siren was like OH FUCKIN SHIT OH NO
but i also love the second alternate part bc siren’s heard all these stories about anonymous’s ability to replicate artists exactly and how skilled they are, and then student opens the door and is just like “okay. siren is here. totally normal.”
siren’s like “i need you to do something for me”
student just scoffs “yeah? you’re going to have to wait, i have to finish a painting for my niece. she asked me to paint her favorite barbie doll” fully serious and siren is just like ??????? and considers using his voice but is just curious and wants to watch you work so just sits back and watches.
also LOVE the concept of the anteater paintings. wilbur is just staring around in anger and annoyance and student is just there, grinning evilly and watching bc they know he wont say anything about it so it’s funny.
#mar talks#glonk :3#glonk you know an awful lot about art theft…..#also im on vacation for another few days so while i cant respond much#PLEASE spam my inbox#i love reading all this#siren wilbur soot#wilbur soot x reader
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i was just thinking about that actually, looking at the torn page of the strach prophecy i think mia and jaser are both "two halves" of the unhaunted one, the order agents just didn't/couldn't account for that properly? i always flipped between thinking "hes the god of fear" and "of course he's the unhaunted one" and was so confused by lack of clarity there. but i think thats the point kinda? fear doesn't have an entity, fear is just Fear. so there is no god of fear *to* meet. just both halves of the prophecy reuniting. there's a few scenes where jaser wanders into view (like when verity is yoinked and when calisto kills beto) but i think most people would not have actually remembered that :sob: so like. idk it could have been implied better. or at least in the opposite way that mia isn't who they're talking about. also yeah both andrea and sofia dying in childbirth was like ok sure parallels and all but cmon. really
oh yeah no i think there's some funky stuff going on with them both being important to the enigma of fear and all that and i agree that i dont think the god of fear is "real" necessarily. and i knew there was some mysterious other figure but quite frankly to me mia should be the center of the game because its about her. im also just not very fond of chosen one kind of stories so that kind of rubbed me the wrong way, although i did really like the ending between the two of them.
jaser also felt kind of strange to me because the first part of the game in the mansion is all about investigating the strachs, but after that point when mia is exploring the other areas she's clearly investigating what happened when equipe elite was there, so it stops being about the strachs and starts being about these order agents who got pulled into the idea of the other ending and the horrors of the perimeter. so then its really weird when all of a sudden everything turns and hinges on this strach kid that we didnt know about until just now. like, i DO get that you're supposed to be bated a little bit, but there was no way to guess that jaser was quite so central-- for a while menace and i were theorizing that maybe mia was the strach baby, actually, until we saw sofia and realized mia couldn't be anything but her daughter (and also mia has veríssimo's eyes as well). i think there were better ways of leaving hints about jaser while still leaving room open for people to think mia was the one all the desassombrado stuff referred to.
idk i think jaser could have used a lot more signposting in that regard-- i think more clues in the mansion and maybe more references to whatever was going on in the unhaunted wing would have helped with that. because truly i was baffled that this random green eyed little freak was suddenly more important than mia. and the fact that even sofia's limited appearances center on jaser rather than mia was disappointing to me, honestly. i wish a lot of things were different in regard to sofia, if i haven't made that obvious enough, and same with andrea, who gets basically no mentions after you leave the mansion and also dies unceremoniously in childbirth.
i enjoyed a huge amount of the story and i had a really fun time with most of the game, don't get me wrong, i just think the bits with jaser/the end of the game needed more work in terms of story as well as the puzzle setups.
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Regarding "that" moment in Part 2 chapter 6 of HI3... (Spoilers)
I'm not sure how to feel about Coralie's death.
Its only mildly foreshadowed with the dog talk, and even after it happens in the simulation, I dont think anyone would have logged out to check on her if Helia hadn't done it.
Because my god, everyone else seemingly lacks empathy. "Hey Helia, wanna join us in the meeting we're gonna have in 15 minutes discussing our next move? We'll re-enter the simulation afterward. Oh Coralie? Didn't you know she died 6 minutes ago?"
Like BRUH. B R U H
Didn't Coralie just DIE? Even if you, elite Valkyries, can brush of death of a partner on this mission you're all on, did you even think for a moment that Helia would be down to continue the mission within an hour after Coralie fucking died?
Its not like they have a time press, doesnt Ajita checkpoint and save their progress? They can literally return at any point. Let Helia grieve for fucks sake!
Like I'm more angry at what happens after Coralie gets mortally wounded. Everyone else seemingly just moves on.
I didn't get particulary attached to either Coralie or Helia before chapter 6, and honestly Helia was basically a different character with how massive her inferiority complex is starting chapter 6, but if Helia just had enough and fucked off and did her own thing now, I think I'd be more invested in her.
Because I dont want Helia to go through "oh Im such a failure, I'll never amount to anything" for a THIRD time. And I sure as hell aren't expecting her to be excited going into the simulation again.
Maybe she'll go back in just to hunt down Listost and get herself killed? I think its that, Helia just being fed up with everyone else and doing her own thing, basically going rogue which I'd like to see because its the most interesting option, or going off to shoot herself due to her insignificance and weakness getting others killed. (In her mind)
I think the "Listost can kill you so hard you die in real life" is kinda bullshit and comes out of nowhere still. Nothing even hinted that the simulation could affect reality to any extent really (I mean... I guess Kiana? But she's rarely brought up). I was expecting Coralie to be gasping and in pain and needing medical and be out of commission for a while. But Listost killing her so hard in the simulation that she dies in real life?
And Coralie herself...? I mean, I'm gonna miss her banter, but her death's gonna come down to how Helia reacts and her actions afterwards.
Because nobody else cared.
The more I think of it the worse it gets. Entropy, Dudu, and Theresa was going to bring back the new Valkyrie into the simulation where their other new Valkyrie was just mortally wounded at like an hour ago.
No empathy for Helia? No concern for her safety since Litost can kill anyone for real? You're not gonna let Helia sit this one out and let her grieve while you go in as an elite striketeam, you know, as the people that could actually fight Listost???
I'd care more for Helia if the writers did!
We kinda didnt see much of Coralie in her final moments so I cant say much about that honestly.
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I would love to hear your Indigo Disk thoughts
YES!!!!!!! 💎🐢💥 full disclosure I only just finished Indigo Disk's main storyline like....less than 24 hours ago so I am still RIDING HIGH FROM THE RUSH OF IT ALL. will probably be spoilers ahead, as a head's up:
first off I love that like. right off the bat youre getting hit with cyrano and cavell old man yaoi. busting out the cute little nicknames like HELLO!!! AND then you have geeta showing up and rika is there for no reason whatsoever and it's like. well ok i think they were having lesbian activities on the plane over you love to see it!
anyway setting wise, the Big Ol Blueberry is pretty fun! I love running around and the Synchro Machine is SUCH a ridiculously fun feature (FINALLY, TRUE GAMING: Dana can run around as a Ninetales and smack a big ball around.) I love all the Unova callbacks and I LOVE THE DIFFERENT CLUB ROOM LAYOUTS!! The monochrome one made me tear up and SEEING THE FUCKIGN. POKESTAR STUDIOS ENEMIES. IN THE FUTURISTIC ONE. MADE ME FEEL SOMETHING. pokestar studios my beloved i miss it sooo much 😭 My buddy Snap was talkin about how the Terarium really kind of lacks... yknow, landmarks and points of interest, though, and god I agree so hard. I love that Kitakami had its own little set of interesting features and places to go and use as landmarks and the Terariuam kind of. Doesn't really have those. It's a bit of a pain in the ass to navigate and easy to get lost but not in a fun way.... even though you have these little neat natural features like The Pride Rock and Chargestone Caves, I wish we coulda had a little bit more :( For such a widely used part of the school it doesn't feel very 'lived' in by the students there. It would've been fun to see more gathering places aside from the Very Sterile Outside Classrooms.....
The Area Zero Underdepths, though...hooouughhHHHhhh. I just. I really have to admire the fact that Indigo Disk said "ohhh you want answers?? you wanna know what's going on in this place? fuck you, youre gonna have MORE questions after this, and theyre gonna be even CRAZIER ones." YOU GO IN THAT HOLE AND LEARN NOTHING AND IM NOT EVEN MAD ABOUT IT. GO LOOK AT THE CRYSTAL TREE DOWN THIS RANDOM PATHWAY. i neeeed to make a terapagos post sometime and talk more about it i cannot stop thinking about this little freak. POKEMON THAT SCARE ME A LITTLE I MUST SAY. POKEMON I DO NOT FEEL IN CONTROL OF. i Know they didnt make its charged terastal form look like a dream catcher for no reason. I Know its Stellar Form Looking Like That isnt for no reason. I know its borderline dangerous power and THAT LITTLE STUNT IT PULLS. AT THE CRYSTAL POOL. THAT'S INDICATIVE OF SOMETHING I THINK. >when Terapagos's cry was the sound Terastalizing has been making all fucking game. SCREAMS.
also again oh my god if you beat the main indigo disk storyline go to the crystal pool right now GO. GO FEEL SOMETHING. GO!!!!
ok well that's. less about setting and more about story though huh. well!! story wise, absolutely loved it! I know there was a lot of apprehension when the DLCs got more properly announced and we found out they didnt really center on Our Dear Paldea Friends as scarvio proper did, and yeah I definitely can see why that's a frustration and a deterrent for some (and I'm soo so excited to hang out with Nemona and Arven and Penny in the epilogue next month....peach time (: ) but for me in the end I'm really just so enamored and delighted with all the new friends you get to make in the DLC and they more than carry that little narrative's arc on its own. The Elite 4 of the BB League are all GREAT, they got nonstop autistic girls out here in gen 9 (nemona, amarys, briar ?!??!) and it ROCKS. and i LOVE Carmine so much, everyone always wants mean rivals and mean women and folks cant even handle Carmine 🙄 you can tell she genuinely has such a big heart and cares about her friends and her brother!!! and Kieran wahhh wahh kieran my newest Little Guy ;____;.... he is SO fourteen and I did not expect to go into the DLC getting really invested in a new character's arc but it's just GOOD. He REALLY feels like a loose yugioh character in Indigo Disk, he's so angry and obsessed with victory and ultimately under it all still capable of so much kindness and regret and he's just GOOD. And his champion battle was terrifying and a BLAST!! THE MUSIC RULES. HE EVEN HAD INCINEROAR.
god and all the music in Indigo Disk was a banger. gen 9 music save me. gen 9 music. save me gen 9 music.
i'm SUPER hyped to do more BBQs with my bestie and do more postgame stuff with the "hanging out with Gym Leaders" thing and the Legendary hunting and such... lots more to roll around in and have a good time with. All in all had just a great time with it, I genuinely might put Violet as my favorite Pokemon game of all time at this point! I do grow very sad thinking about just how even more fantastic this game couldve been if it had 1-3 more years to cook properly though, like..god damn. I was getting some LAG on those cutscenes, and I know I made out pretty alright in the bugs department!!
but for now i'll just be thinking about the shit that happens at the crystal pool for the rest of my life. also Indigo Disk gave me the best possible trainer ID photo i never need to change it again
#TY FOR ASKING!!!! i do love talking pokemon especially scarvio stuff theres so much to unpack#and oh god i gotta talk about that fucking turtle#asks#anonymous#scarvio spoilers /#indigo disk spoilers /#pokemon chattering
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i don't know if you still think about Bad Succession but i have a proposal: instead of shiv actually cheating on tom with nate, nate is actually shiv's Sexist Jerk Ex Boyfriend that she hates and is only working with out of convenience that flirts with her but she never reciprocates. but then one day tom sees nate make a move on shiv and immediately assumes that she's cheating on him, but then he doesn't get to see shiv shove him away afterwards and berate him. there's an entire arc in season 1 all about this miscommunication where tom breaks the engagement off because of what he saw and shiv is heartbroken but is determined to have tom realize it was all a misunderstanding and get him back. shiv stands outside of their apartment (that tom kicked her out of) holding up a radio playing Their Song (you can decide what it is) and tom peeks out of the window. he starts tearing up a little and there's a flashback to the night they met and that song was playing but once it fades out he shakes his head and goes "i'm sorry shiv... but we're over." before shutting the window. then one episode while at a business party nate sees shiv again. he's all like "well well well, i hear things didn't work between you and mr. minnesota. maybe it's time you give old natey a chance, eh shiv?" but then shiv is like "yeah well tom and i are going to get back together. we're just... in a rough spot right now." and nate's like "oh come on. what could you possibly see in him? you should just forget about boring tom and get with an exciting guy like me." then there's a pause and shiv is like. "okay. you really wanna know what i see in tom, nate? i see the love of my life. my biggest supoorter. i know that if i get into trouble, he'll be there to have my back. that's a lot more than i can say for an entitled douchebag like you, who's so blinded by his privilege and toxic masculinity that he can't think of anyone other than himself. yeah, tom's not from the big city, and he doesn't have the biggest house or car, but you know what? that's because he worked for what he got instead of having it handed to him, and if you think that makes him boring, then so be it. i'm more than proud to have him as my partner. and... as my future husband!" then she splashes the wine she's holding in his face before walking away and there's a shot of nate looking all shocked. she goes to sulk outside when tom comes out to sit next to her. he's like "hey... so... i saw what you said to nate. did you really mean all that?" and shiv is like "tom... of course i did." and tom's like "i thought... at the party before, that you were cheating on me with him." and shiv is like "WHAT? god, tom, no! i would never cheat on you." and tom's like "well.. now i feel so guilty. i'm sorry for jumping to conclusions, shiv." and shiv's like "and i'm sorry that i never told you about what nate was like before, tom. let's agree never to let a misunderstanding like this get in between us again!" then they kiss and the engagement is back on and they get married.
oh absolutely. and thank u for such a complete and elaborate proposal :) im obsessed w tom leaving before he can see her shoving nate away. that’s the kind of misunderstanding that would be aggravatingly dragged out over a season for sure. and it’s sad to lose the dinner party where she and roman make fun of tom’s suits, but you’re right, Bad Succession shiv would have to work up the courage to defend tom against the elitism of her peers.
i had some vague thoughts about Bad Succession tomshiv, which your ideas align with, in terms of tom and shiv being more bland and conventionally sympathetic, and this being accomplished by focusing on external interpersonal factors sabotaging the relationship, removing blame from tom and shiv themselves. the issues would be Misogyny (in the most direct, non-systemic way possible) and Her Evil Dad. the struggles within shiv regarding the harm she causes tom to maintain a feeling of safety within the relationship would get phased out pretty quick. I’m thinking when tom proposes, she’s hesitant. She says “I think you should know, before you get too close… I’m Damaged”. but over the course of their marriage she lets down her armour and learns to Love In A Healthy Way. as for their career ambitions, they would eventually learn that Love is the most important thing. tom would have an emotional moment where he says “i love you, not your money, you” (bc in this alternate universe that’s 100% unquestionably true, deep down beneath the seductions of wealth and power he’s just a boy from saint paul who fell in love with the most beautiful girl in the world) and at the end they’d run off together to a trailer park
also Their Song would be Uptown Girl. sorry to steal that from kendall’s kidnapping fantasy vehicular manslaughter extravaganza but Bad Succession would have used it here first
#thing abt bad succession is it would not be internally consistent at all in terms of messaging. so anything that fits the vibe is canon.#all the ideas do not have to make much sense put together because it is kind of vague and structureless.. a figment of our imaginations..#mailbox#succession#ruby (unfortunately) watches succession#tom wambsgans#shiv roy
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morse being queer (and other commentary) pt 15:
season 4, episode 3, “Lazaretto”:
- my expectations are really low for this episode
- the last episode was so aggressively gay i’m just assuming this one won’t be
- unfortunate but here we are!
- ew i hate hospitals
- i love old nurse uniforms though
- elite fashion tbh
- morse in a wife beater agenda ‼️
- of fucking course joan called him from a goddam pay phone
- i’m IRRITATED 🗣️
- my tv is glitching the fuck out
- fixed it!
- anyways
- the head nurse reminds me of the sister in fleabag and i always think it’s her but it’s not
- and that’s my story
- morse uses the same body language with debryn that he uses with women he’s attracted to
- i’m just saying 🤷♀️
- the way everyone looks at the parrot is so fucking funny
- we are barely ten minutes into this episode and we’re already headed to the armory
- NO BRIGHT NO
- anyone but bright.
- you can kill ANY CHARACTER
- bright killed a tiger tho i’m pretty sure he’s immortal at this point
- no because listen
- debryn is perfect for morse
- IM SERIOUS
- he comes to the hospital immediately out of loyalty to the precinct and also because he knows morse is there alone
- he immediately tells morse who is in the operating room and that the surgeon is talented and morse doesn’t have to worry
- and then promises to go see what’s what for morse so he doesn’t have to wear himself out
- and THEN he brings morse’s mind back to the case hes working on because he knows morse copes by working and wants to take his mind off bright
- debryn knows all the ins and outs of morse’s brain and respects every facet of him and works in favor of him every time without fail
- hes fucking perfect
- i love him
- everyone loves bright so much i’m sick
- the head nurse reminds me of the evil lady from chicken run
- i hate this lady caroline
- she didn’t really do anything wrong in this moment with morse but like
- you are the mother of the woman who broke morse as a human being and forever scarred his perception of love
- and then ur gonna brag about what her new man is doing? just to rub it in that he “wasn’t good enough” for her and still isn’t?
- despicable.
- i don’t even wanna promote the queer aspects of that even tho it would be easy to
- because that was just fucking cruel
- and morse deserved better
- it cannot be comfortable for bakewell to have his arm cuffed up like that for that long
- they should do it lower for sure
- justice for winnie ‼️‼️‼️
- i love her i just want her to be happy
- trewlove is so worried about bright
- bright and trewlove 🤞🤞 i love them
- “We were engaged to be married. And then we weren’t.”
- THIS is why morse is the most relateable fictional character ever to me personally
- because he SIMPLIFIES this sort of stuff
- he could tell the whole story
- say what transpired and why she left and what he did wrong or didn’t do wrong and who she’s with now and why he became a cop instead of pushing himself and being happy
- but he says this.
- we were and then we weren’t.
- because all human experience can be taken as that.
- we are and then we aren’t
- and it’s all very simple
- and despite all the pain he feels and all the ways it’s affected his life
- he knows it’s as simple as that
- THIS FUCKING SHOW RAHHHSHEKFOSK 🦅🦅🦅
- the way that nurse mills keeps side eyeing morse
- girl calm down
- the way morse runs 💀
- go morse go! 🏃♀️🏃♀️
- thursday should not have left bakewell and i stand by that
- even though nothing happens someone should have stayed with him to keep him safe
- but noooo 🙄🙄🙄 thursday has to care about morse and make sure he’s okay
- morse just visiting debryn for fun at this point
- monica 🥺🥺
- JESUS THURSDAY
- slamming his head against the brick wall is so wild
- unnecessary some might say!
- perhaps even… police brutality!
- which you’ve been suspended for!!
- every time i start to like him 🙄🙄
- oh my GOD monica is so beautiful
- “treat the next one better.”
- GET HIM MONICA
- both of them avoiding the question “are you happy?”
- final straw
- the way thursday just hates having brights job
- it’s so funny
- thursday loves winnie so much i’m SICK
- i’ll prolly never get married but if i do i want it to be like them
- the way this show handles mental health issues is like
- actually not that bad
- like 8/10 times they do a really good job
- especially given the time period
- he’s a murderer and all but bakewell is funny as fuck
- “i get the uncontrollable urge to murder nosy parkers 😡. ta for the grapes 🥰🥰!”
- like ok??!
- funny as fuck
- that picture of joan is absolutely foul
- just throwing it out there
- “i had a reverse charges call from leamington.” “wasnt me.”
- i hate her right now
- i know i said i loved her like two posts ago but i fucking hate her
- like she’s intentionally hurting these people and doesn’t care
- like how does she just not care how much what she’s doing is affecting the people in her life?
- i know she’s traumatized
- but ONE phone call to ur parents wouldn’t kill you 🙄
- i have 0 understanding of how she’s blaming herself for the death at the bank
- they didn’t know who she was until he was already dead
- like girl get it together
- “i don’t care.” “i do.” “you shouldn’t.”
- GIRL SHUT UP ‼️‼️
- pissing me tf off
- anyways 😐
- bright is so 🥺🥺
- just a little guy tbh
- GIVE BRIGHT CHILDREN🗣️🗣️🗣️ (he’s like 80 years old do not give him kids)
- what is this trend of bringing grapes to people in the hospital? is that something i should be aware of?
- goddam morse’s ex is RICH
- the way that people don’t like dr. powell because they think he’s a ladies man but he literally just wants to be a doctor 😭
- let my man breathe!
- the way susan was sick TWO YEARS AGO and morse looks worried like it’s happening right now
- “have you spoken to susan?” “yes. i haven’t mentioned you.”
- girl shut your bitchass up
- sick and tired of your classist bullshit
- this guy talking to corpses is so 🤨🤨
- NO BAKEWELL‼️
- what the fuck.
- how on earth is dr. powell working from 7:30 in the morning until after 3 in the morning the next day
- how does he function
- stop 🥺 the way morse turns his back before strange opens the trunk and then just peeks over his shoulder to look
- he’s a fucking pussy 😐
- KIDDING
- i’m obsessed w him and i truly believe his inability to look at the deceased is his most endearing quality
- thursday cares about morse sm i’m SICK
- NAUR THEYRE PUTTING BRIGHT IN BED TEN
- morse talking to the parrot is funny as fuck tbh
- morse is obsessed w debryn
- how the fuck did debryn notice a microscopic wound on someone’s ass
- he’d have to be STUDYING that ass
- wild!
- anywho
- i love the way morse talks to debryn and debryn talks to morse
- just two geniuses bouncing off each other 🥰🥰
- trewlove OUT OF UNIFORM coming to visit bright is so sweet
- it’s like he has a daughter
- i’m obsessed ✋🙄
- okay i was wrong. powell is a terrible person!
- the nurses are dramatic asf tbh
- i cannot imagine real nurses behaving this way
- oh my god susan’s dad died
- this could be my breaking point!
- i also would love to point out the fact that morse insists on formalities in most if not all situations, meaning he refers to people as “Ms./Mrs./Mr. ____”
- but he calls susan’s mom “Caroline”
- just her first name and nothing else
- like he and susan were engaged to be married
- like he really loved her and she maybe really loved him
- like at some point her parents loved morse and took him in
- like they treated him like family
- like they were excited for him to marry their daughter and therefore let him call them by their first names
- like they were close
- like a family
- everything about what happened between him and susan HURTS and idk how to handle it
- also i FUCKING HATE CAROLINE
- “I’m so sorry.” “Are you?” “Yes, of course. Edgar was always very decent to me.” “Well, he always had a weakness for failures.”
- like YOUR DAUGHTER LEFT MORSE
- not the other way around
- i fucking hate classism
- there’s a whole other analysis i could do of this whole situation that would be about his queerness and how it could play into all this but i’m like
- i fucking hate caroline
- she sucks so bad
- like the way she tells him the CHIEF CONSTABLE RUPERT STANDISH said he would never amount to much
- which already is bullshit because of his involvement with landesman and wintergreen, meaning that he was involved with the group who intentionally sabotaged morse and are still attempting to now (he died in the neverland episode so it’s not him directly anymore but still)
- and then says “You didn’t even pass your sergeants exam!”
- which is bullshit because she doesn’t know what happened and he can’t defend himself because it’ll make it sound like he’s making excuses for what she’s interpreting as failures
- “You see, I was right about you, even then.” “When you speak to Susan please give her my condolences.” “And your love.” “No. No. Look, whatever you may think of me, I am truly sorry he’s dead.”
- the DISGUST on his face when she says “and your love”
- i fucking hate her
- and morse deserved better
- it’s obvious that what happened is still tearing him up even now
- and that’s why he’s so sensitive about people leaving him (jakes, joan)
- and why he will always assume people he’s in love with or carries any love for are going to leave
- i fucking hate this show ‼️‼️
- two female murderer episodes in a row i am running my hands together like a little mouse
- this girl is wild for killing that many people tbh
- morse hugging her instead of dragging her away ☹️
- he’s so gentle i HATE IT HERE
- thank fuck bright lived
- idk how i would have reacted if something happened tbh
- i cannot believe the only shot we get of susan is from the back 😐
- okay for you tarot kids!
- intersecting the tower card with the death card usually has a lot of negative meanings. it represents suffering, typically by means of illness or pain of some kind
- the death card is a typically pretty happy card despite the connotation, but when combined with the tower card it’s p shit
- the tower card usually represents suffering or destruction
- combing the two cards doesn’t bode well for morse and it’s our first intersection in the reading we’re getting at the end of these episodes!
- so far we have sacrifice, union, and now a traumatizing ending of something resulting in suffering
- things are not boding well for our boy!
#it is four in the morning#i have to be up at 8#oh well#for the people! i shout#no one is listening#endeavour#endeavour itv#endeavour morse#morse#itv endeavour
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💛Smoshblr December Asks Day 19💙
What are your top 3 fave/dream cast constellations for smosh vids? (so typically 4-6 people each)
Bonus: What are your top 3 smosh ships?
ohhhh boy.... its like picking between my kids......
arasha-courtney-spencer-tommy: everything to me. think about this. arasha and courtney is everything. arasha and spencer are sibs (to me). arasha and tommy are SO funny. and of course spourtommy is Everything so like there is no loss here there is only fun and silliness. anyone else is just bonus <3
amanda-angela-chanse-damien-shayne: thats damn right! the sword af crew! i honestly don't even think i need to explain this one bc every combination here contains gut-busting laughter.
anthony-ian-angela-chanse-arasha: just two dads and their kids. once again every combo here is more elite than the last, so i don't think i Really need to explain, but im truly obsessed with the way anthony interacts with the new cast. they are all unhinged all the time and he is a bemused, exhausted father of three who works three jobs and doesn't understand a Single word they say but supports them anyway.
and ships...... that one is SO much harder.
spommy: i mean. obviously. im sorry they're everything to me. silly lil guys. what would i be without their homoerotic friendship and the consequential birth of spommy nation
shaymien: i mean. the ogs. i was living in this fandom when they were THE ship and rightfully so. they will always have an incredibly special place in my heart <3
now.......... this is so tough. bc tbh there's only two options but the question is Which One. now im gonna put them both here bc they honestly tie BUT i will give you a definitive answer bc i have one. the two are shackie (they will ALWAYS be famous to me.........) and amangela (oh my god. im ill just thinking about it.). both of them are everything to me for different reasons and i truly love them equally BUT. im gonna go with amangela on a technicality bc. is shackie technically a smosh ship if jackie doesn't work there anymore :') (it is to me and i love them ravenously okay. if shackie has no fans i am dead. you know how it goes.)
i wanna give a bonus shoutout to honorable mentions shaynse, kimney, courtivia, courtrasha, triple a (altogether AND in every combo), spourtney, jamien, ianthony, and definitely some others that im missing bc truly this was such a tough question for my multi-shipping ass
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'Eat it up. You’re all fuckin welcome <3' 💀
VANESSA WILLIAMS IN DRAG YES
'Okay Detox with the feathers' AGJHJFJDJD
Honey Mahogany's energy!!
Game On Bitch: The Sequel
RuPaul's suit and shoes!!
Giving out better prizes than Food Network—
'I can see your SEAFOOD PLATTER' HELP
LEAVE THE UNTUCKED GIRLIES ALONE
RuPaul: You look like Calimari when you do that!
Alyssa: https://youtube.com/shorts/A0y8Nve-SyU?si=wsgaOZdWC_4_3aqM
'I don't know how to swim' same.
To be fair this would be quite a challenge for anybody 💀
'There’s got to be a morning after' Thank God for Homosexuals. Their taste is fuckin elite
VIV!
Alaska, I— same
HELPPPP
LYNESHA!!
TUNA TURNER SGSHKTHDM
Ppl who wear cheetah print are automatically cool as fuck.
Premiere Jewish Narcoleptic Drag Queen Jinx—we love you
I would love to be one of those dudes doing random shit for the queens, what a fun job
I really thought it was Lynesha!! But Detox's entire outfit and face and vibe is just amazing
Chaz!!
BARBIE??
RUPAULS GLASSES
I'm making the same face as them 💀
Jinx <3
ALASKA AVSVNGGSHDNAFN
'What are they talkin bout over there. . .' AFSHKDJFJ
'I just wanna keep it kind of classy'— 'yeah. . .' SHSHKJRHSHLRJ
'Okay' 👁👄👁
RuPaul's suit—even his voice and energy! Very Willy Wonka
Roxxxy is so amazing.
PENNYS OUTFIT
I feel like Alaska is going home. . .
Alyssa is trying it—
ALYSSA SHUT UP
Alaska + Sharon's relationship <3
ALYSSA SHUT UP
SERENA—tbh I understand why she's being obnoxious, she's probably very nervous. You can see it her eyes. But the ageism is not it
RUPAULS LOOK
Gosh, this is so cute <3
Roxxxy look is the 2009–est I've ever seen. Good for her.
JINX
'Loofa my ass' AHAJOWHSKDJKEHD
JEM AND THE HOLOGRAMS
HONEY!!!
'Hehehehe yes please' AGDNKDHSH
PENNY
COCO!
VIV IS GIVING BEYONCE
Alaska's hair!!
LYNESHAS FACE
MONICA I LOVE YOU
Viv is so !!!
RuPaul is so frickin ominous.
If Lynesha gets sent home I'm gonna yeet my computer.
Ivy's was beautiful but it wasn't like. SERVING serving
WHAT WAS THAT AGGRESSIVE BITE
Camille's dress so is lovely!!
Lynsha is my wife.
Jade's look was chaotic. I agree w what's his face. The idea was there, but I feel like her look could have been better put together
MAE WEST YEAH
'TILTED PELVIS' AND RUPAUL'S CACKLING AFTERHSHGKFJH
RuPaul is chaotic neutral as hell.
Michelle <3
Lynesha 😍
Roxxxy!!! YES
YES LYNESHA IS SAFE
'Coutorture' 💀
I think Penny is safe. SHE BETTER BE
'Edit' — definitely!
DO NOT SEND PENNY HOME
NOT PARTY IN THE USA
I feel like Serena is staying. She seems like she’s gonna learn her lesson about learning from others
Penny writing 'you are all stars' is genuinely making me cry
im really sorry straight ppl don't have this.
What a RIDEEEEEE omg!! I’m so happy that you enjoyed it its such a good season to start!!!! Who are you rooting for? Who do you think is gonna win as of right now?
Omg i remember watching with my friend and she was LOVING Penny Tration and i sat next to her like 😬 oh no
Also imma have to dm you about Sh*ron i forgot they mention her every fucking episode 😭😭
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maxon come back plzzz (the elite)
ch21-24
Ch 21
-not the king and maxon leaving to go to asia
-maxon must be 5’8 the way they be describing him
-”call ahead and tell them to go easy on us” maxon you gotta be kinding if you think this girl got ties like that
-oop kriss is taking itttttttt
-i hate america i really do but this kinda behavior with kriss woulda had me tweaking tf out fr
-”you are such an idiot sometimes” gurl arent you tryna win him and you calling him a dummy
-”he noted the homemade bracelet I wore. He studied it, seeming confuse, then kissed my hand tenderly” america better pray that maxon dont know what the guards buttons look like. America really dumb af.
-not anne finding aspen in america room omgg can somebody jump him plzz, where the hell is this rod when you really need it.
-”he was in plain clothes, not his uniform” bro i think aspen was meant to be a 6 cause this level of ignorance is unmatched.
-”maxon is gone. This changes everything.” ummmmm no it does not, goofy
Ch 22
-atp they shoulda put cameras in all the rooms cause im tired of them sneaking around
-i dont even wanna read this bitch ass chapter
-”i dont like talking about him anyway” ofc you dont, only cause he tryna take your girl
-”and the injections, too” yall getting fed and bbls??
-my thing is if aspen really wanted to make change wouldnt he let america be a princess since she'll actually speak out about all the nonsense going on. Cause if you take her, maxon is gonna marry someone else and the exact same shit is going to continue to happen.
-”slowly, he lowered me to the mattress of pillows” i want them both to die
-”there was a newfound confidence there, something instilled in him through becoming a two” why not a one, imagine the confidence a one could have
-”when this was all over, would i be a two or a one?” bro this wack ass caste system. The only reason cass set it up like this was to make it seem like there was a real competition here, but wth kinda comp is it between a prince and a guard, like sir you are THE HELP,
-america is just greedy asf, maybe she needs a poly relationship since she cant chose.
Ch 23
-”but elise family says they never arrived” oop the prince and king is mia
-not the king saying they there but elise family wth is they at
-not kriss pulling her in the garden to chat about maxon, this finna get juicy
-”i think you and i might be neck and neck at this point” oooppp she saying yall is equally in the running omggg
-”anyway, he loved it. He said no one had given him a present yet”. Damnnnnnn america you really missed the ball on that opportunity
-omggg he done took kriss to his room and not even miss thing has been
-”anyway he started visiting me during pretty much every free moment he had” im gonna be sick
-he aint even try to kiss her yet, good
-”i dont know how you feel, but i love him” damn. Miss home of the brave couldnt even say that and here go kriss confusing easilyyy
-not the rebels demanding they end the selection, yall dont like a little drama lol
CH24
-broo imma need maxon to get back and soon
-”what if maxon was dead?” girl dont act like you care
-oop waitaminute the king and maxon are coming home tonighttttt, thank god
-”kriss left seconds later. Maybe she was making a welcome home card.” lol i sure hope so
-not the maids fightingggg
-are the maids not also a two? See this why this caste system doesnt work
-oh wait nvm i guess not
-she back to reading gregory’s diary, im not reading all that tho yall be easy
-damn he wrote a lot
-not she tryna look decent for maxon, i know thats right
-awww not him gifting her a blue bracelett, i need someone who will think about me in a whole different country
-”i didnt find anything for anyone else” period
-broo this could all be hers, but she so slowww
-”im just really confused about you rn.” GIRL hes the one whose been confused about YOU
-”if you ever want to know anything about me… all you need to do is ask.” now THAT is a man
-”i dont know if im ready to do that yet” whats the number to this palace, im calling in a bomb threat myself
-maxon gone for days, yall thinking he died, he returns, and this is how yall communicate when he gets back palease.
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I will now Proceed to yap about my design process IN DETAIL because im what? A HUGE FUCKING NERD!
The pose:
So going into this the pose was the first thing i thought of, I wanted to have a really cool looking pose that could showcase his god status and his domain, father hood, so I needed a pose that was both godly and fatherly after brainstorming I landed on this, Odysseus behind a young archer adjusting his stance and pointing him to where he should aim, this not only allowed me to show him in action but also showing him doing something fatherly which fit his title as the god of fatherhood perfectly! Having a second person present also allowed me to show the size difference in Odysseus now he is a god, while Odysseus is definitely still a short king compared to the other gods (he is a short king no matter what universe) but compared to mortals he now towers over them.
The colours:
I wanted this to actually look like a marble statue so i challenged myself by restricting what colours I used, I wanted to use only earth/stone colours and wanted to use the least amount of different colours as I could, so in the end I stuck to greys whites and browns
Dark grey and light grey for hair and fur
Dark brown and light brown for fabric leather and wood
Eggshell white and grey for metal and brass
And then the slightly yellowy grey for skin
Now the laurel crown Odysseus is wearing is a navy black colour which is the only thing besides his eyes that are that colour purely because I wanted it to POP in the sea of grey hair.
The design:
Now the design! Gonna split this into 2 because of their being to characters present.
Odysseus:
Odysseus the main man himself, I knew I would need to “god-ify” his design a bit to sell the fact this man is a god now, so I looked at what traits he already had and expanded on them,
• long hair? Give him a big ol’ lions mane, I decided to have his hair tied up at the end to resemble a wolfs tail to match the wolf and olive symbolism I had for him( we will get to that in a bit) and I gave him a braid that you can see flowing above his main lock of hair, I headcannon it that the younger female “children of Odysseus” do his hair up in braids and he happily keeps them done until they undo them to try a new style on dear old dad.
• facial hair? Meter long beard, beards are naturally a very masculine trait and masculinity is heavily intertwined with fatherhood in nature so giving him this luscious beard was a no brainer.
now outside of just “god-ifying” what was already their I had to add my own design additions to make Odysseus look like a god? But also still look like HIM because Odysseus despite already being a king, never deserved to lavishly, he was very functional in that sense, so I needed to design him in a way that was godly but still something odyssey would wear, so I went with a classic brass breast and back plate. Now as for the lower body clothing I honestly didn’t think to hard about what type of ancient greek clothing ody would wear but rather just what would look best, but if I was to describe it id say its a chilton/long tunic length exomis with both shoulders down, but according to what I read a exomis was usually worn by working or fighting men because it gave easier range of movement while a chilton/long tunic was worn by charioteers, the elite and mature men, and I gotta say a fusion between those two outfits feels very fitting for ody if I do say. Again the shoes I didn’t give to much thought to besides looking up what footwear men used and tried to replicate that (but I think I some how gave him dad sandals/sliders which I gotta say accidentally giving the god of dads a classic piece of father footwear is incredibly fitting.) Oh and obviously because its ody he has got scars all around his body cus well he has been through a lot and those scars have stories to tell, and dads having epic dad lore/cool scars is just fun.
The boy:
Now onto the boy, now obviously this isn’t an established character and someone I made up, one of the “children of Odysseus” so I focussed on trying to make it obvious this was a kid adopted by ody through his fashion. Right away I knew I wanted to give him Ody’s dumb hat (you know the one) because of course god odysseus would give all his children a replica of his dumb hat, and on the hat you can see an embroidered laurel crown to match ody’s own laurel crown, moving further down we have a simple short above the knee chiton, standard outfit for a young man, with him wearing some armour on top of that which consists of a breast plate shoulder plates back plate and a battle skirt then same footwear as Odysseus! Now how is this actually matching to Odysseus hm? Well for one he has a matching bracelet with his father he also has a wolf fur lining to his chiton like his father, and on his battle skirt you can see some olive and upside down olive tree imagery! Speaking off
THE DETAILS AND IMAGERY:
Now obviously all the god have imaginary tied to them that is easily recognised and you can instantly associate with them, now ody as a mortal from what I have seen anyway just uses Athena’s imagery since he was her student but thats not gonna fly now he is his own god on par with her so i needed to think of some god imagery for ody, well what do we associate with Odysseus? Well for one in epic Odysseus and his family are associated with wolves a lot “guess the pack of WOLVES is swimming with the shark now” “fight little WOLF fight” add that with the fact wolves are most known for being in packs aka FAMILIES! it makes sense to have wolves be one of Odysseus’ associated animals and themes, okay what else? Well what about olives? I mean the olive tree bed is iconic to Odysseus and his story plus it can tie back to the idea of FAMILY trees, which is fitting for the god of fatherhood (and yes I am aware athena is also associated with olives but respectfully how many times have you thought about athena and went HMMM YES OLIVES) so wolves and olives, how do we get that symbolism into a design huh? Well lets break it down ( 🕺 💃 🕺 💃)
Wolves: right away lets tie odys hair into a wolf tail (hey remember that? Told you we’d come back to that) next line his clothing with wolf fur. We also can make his quiver resemble a wolf! Make it look like the wolf is eating the arrows, we can also add some wolf imagery to the bow by making to top of the bow a howling wolf head! Odysseus himself is also very hairy like a wolf.
Olives: now for olives im thinking have some olives growing from his laurel crown, he can also have a pendent attached to his quivers shoulder strap bearing his olive symbol and then on the boy’s armour you have have olives and upside olives trees on the skirts plates!
Now for the other details
The headband: obviously I had to have Odysseus wrap polites’s headband around his own arm, the kindness of polites’s open arms philosophy is one Odysseus gets to put into practice every day with his beloved children.
Hair braid: I already mentioned this but id like to reiterate this here as I consider it a neat detail how Odysseus lets the kids style his hair into cute braids.
His jewellery: Odysseus is wearing some jewellery on his hands and after doing some research the finger you wear rings on has meaning!
• A ring on the ring finger is obviously a wedding ring, even as a god he is still the ultimate malewife to Penelope
• a ring on the pointer finger is for affiliation so like if your in a group, so I can see this being a ring he got when he became king or just jewellery belonging to the royal Ithacan family.
• and that a ring on the pinky is for a personal statement so basically ody just flexing he got style, or what I prefer, him wearing a ring made by one of his children a personal statement that he loves all his children.
He is also wearing a bracelet and arm cuff because one its fashionable and 2 so he can match with his kids, give them all a bracelet matching his so they feel accepted and so they can all identify each other as family, we love fashion with a purpose.
He also has a hair bead to make that signature wolf tail look.
Now lets talk to bow and quiver, obviously all gods have an associated weapon, zeus and his lightning, Poseidon and his trident you get the deal, now obviously Odysseus still has his palintonos bow in a pinch but having a bow crosses into Artemis and Apollo’s weapon category of bow users, so I thought what if instead Odysseus encourages others to fight for themselves instead of fighting for them, so I thought instead of him wielding the bow his children do (or anyone he is aiding in battle) and instead he supplies the arrows, his quiver has the power to spawn an infinite number of arrows and not just any kind of arrow WOLF ARROWS what is a wolf arrow? Simple you shoot the arrows like normal and then on command the arrow can morph into a wolf and hunt down its target! Odysseus can command these wolves at will but he can also lend them to whoever he is aiding, so he can both pick up the bow himself and go to town on some fools or empower his ally with infinite wolf arrows! Giving someone the power to fight for themselves or step in and fight for them! Thats pretty fatherly if I dare say so myself.
And I think thats about it! Thank you for coming to my ted talk about my hyperfixation I hope you enjoyed!
GOD ODYSSEUS AU ART!
Okay so I have made some art of Odysseus in my god Odysseus au! (For context i have an epic au where 20+ years after the odyssey Odysseus dies and ascends to godhood as the god of fatherhood, cause he is the ultimate dad afterall)
So anyway I wanted to make God Odysseus a statue like other greek gods have! Like the kind you would find in their temples that people would pray to, so after finding pictures of greek statues on the internet, cobbling them together to make a base for me draw off, sticking to stone colours to make it actually look like a marble stature, and trying to make Odysseus look “godly” enough its finally done! (I would like to clarify i am NOT an artist but simply an epic nerd powered by adhd and the gay audacity)
Here is God Odysseus! Depicted helping one on the children of Odysseus (name for all the children Odysseus went around adopting after becoming a god) fire a bow! A pretty fatherly thing to do if you ask me!
Hope you all like this art and introduction to my God Odysseus AU!
#god odysseus au!#odysseus#epic odysseus#epic the musical#yapping#character design#god of fatherhood because he is the best dad to ever dad in the existence of dads
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ASTERIA'S 2.5K FOLLOWER FIC REC LIST
i read fics just as much as i write them so here are some of my favourites. tysmsm for this milestone, i love you all <3 quick note: i didn't re-tag anyone if i recommended more than one of your works because of the tag limit.
───────── girls ─────────
hermione granger
tuesdays - @stupxfy
probably one of my all time favs for hermione. it's just so well written and adorable and fluffy and yes.
if i could tell her - @hellounicorn
pining, pining, PINING. the way these emotions and hermione's described is just... art. perfection. there's a happy ending and it is so worth the build up.
darling dearest - @dracolvr
fluffy goodness. read to be hopelessly in love with hermione ─ which, let's be real, we all are.
november rain - @pansydaisy
uhm i love this one sm. it's so simple but amazing ─ everyone has their days like this and having hermione to cure them? it's what everyone needs.
i need more - @15-dogs
i sobbed the first time i read this. it'll break your heart but it's so amazingly written that it's worth the sadness. actual gut wrenching / mindblowing writing.
how the potter girls react to you in lingerie - @pottersanime
the title. need i say more?
honeyed eyes - @minty-malfoy
HEAVEN. being hermione's first kiss as friend? but both of you idiots liking each other? oh my god, sign me up.
hugging her from behind - @pastanest
again, the title. read to feel 🥺💙
grey days - @pepperimps01
PANSMIONE 😌😌 it's angsty with a happy ending and i love it sm. this does such a perfect job of capturing pansy and hermione's relationship growing and having its ups and downs with just a few paragraphs. honestly so good
grenade - @hellounicorn
another one that'll make your heart shatter. but in the best way. these are the fics i live for where the you can't help but feel like it's really happening to you and hermione and god it's so fucking powerful. underrated writing right here in general. and also pansmione is the loml so it hurts in that way.
honeybees - @pansydaisy
fluffy aesthetic heaven.
lead the way - @teacup-tai
more pansmione but this is pure filthy thinking and satisfies all the sexual tension dreams pansmione shippers have.
two queens in a king sized bed - @shysneeze
domestic christmas morning with hermione and it's angelic.
would you still love me if i turned into a worm? - @minty-malfoy
one of those blurbs i never imagined i'd read or love so much. not to mention it's spot on and adorable.
pansy parkinson
right and wrong - @starrkidmalfoy
a first kiss and the overdone trope that i will never get sick of, the bitch who's soft only for you. the descriptions in this are perfection and the writing is beautiful <3
messed up - @writseo
toxic, messed up love fics will be the death of me. insane how well you captured it all and i just yes damn fucking props.
pansy parkinson imagine - @moonlight-imagines
*screams* THE BEST FRIEND BANTER + THE ENDING OH MY GOD OH MY GOD ─ I SCREAMED WHEN I FIRST READ THIS. I LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE IT.
dating pansy would include - @lotsoffandomimagines
ABSOLUTE POWER COUPLE SHIT and to this day, pansy saying "jealous much?" when being scolded for pda remains iconic.
grey days - @pepperimps01
as i said before: PANSMIONE 😌😌 it's angsty with a happy ending and i love it sm. this does such a perfect job of capturing pansy and hermione's relationship growing and having its ups and downs with just a few paragraphs. honestly so good
new rules - @silversslytherin
excuse me this is immaculate ─ pansy is the best friend and the second you see that she's also the best s/o, you're done for. perfection.
study "dates" - @turning-dreams-into-chaos
the title is self explanatory and this whole thing is fluffy heaven <3
how the potter girls react to you in lingerie - @pottersanime
read the title, thank me later.
lead the way - @teacup-tai
more pansmione but this is pure filthy thinking and satisfies all the sexual tension dreams pansmione shippers have.
traitor - @hufflepuff-writings
a masterpiece where pansy chooses the wrong side in the battle of hogwarts. this ties up so well and the writing is so powerful.
back alley love potions - @a-simple-imagine
this actually hurts but in a beautiful way. watching pansy give draco a love potion is such a fucking concept and this is executed incredibly.
my little bunny - @emmamarie7708
pansy making you do this is so dirty yet she's slightly sweet and i am a sucker for it. god is a woman and her name is pansy fucking parkinson.
pansy parkinson imagine - @moonlight-imagines
i'll let pansy beat people up for me all day. they put me in madame pomfrey's, feel my girlfriend's wrath.
ginny weasley
blissful - @enyastasia
fluffy ginny goodness. the friends to lovers? the amazing kiss? 🥺🥺🥺💞💞 this fic lives in my heart <3
bubble pop electric - @hunnypot-imagines
this is hotter than a lot of actual smut and the chemistry is so... wow. ginny weasley owns me.
dear ginny - @alyssamalfoy
how does this short ass letter manage to make me feel so much. it's sorcery but i don't even care, it's beautiful.
wildflower - @pansydaisy
will i ever get tired of cheeky i love yous? not when loves like ginny weasley and ayli's so so pretty writing exist.
all i want - @hellounicorn
ouch. fuck you harry :) quite possibly the best ginny fic i have ever read. insanely talented writing, i genuinely feel every touch of emotion you put down and you need to know how amazing that is. keep breaking my heart.
linny hcs - @bluebirdlinginthenest
who doesn't need good linny content in their life?
how the potter girls react to you in lingerie - @pottersanime
sexy bitch, fuck me up.
willow - @padmeamiala
ginny is the loml. her brothers can cry about it.
bellatrix lestrange
attempting to bake with bellatrix - @carters-coffee
MY FAVOURITE BELLA FIC ─ there's not enough bellatrix fluff out there but this makes up for the lack of. heaven.
bellatrix prompt - @carters-coffee
this gives me chills. she knows she's a bad bitch and that's what we love about her.
change of plans - @dumb-sbian
why THE FUCK have i not had a rainy morning with bellatrix? she can sleep and mumble something just like this and i'm still head over heels for her.
being tortured as bellatrix's girlfriend - @writings-of-a-british-fangirl
definitely a concept BUT this makes me feel some type of way and i recommend giving it a minute of your time 😌
bellatrix finding out you're a muggleborn - @carters-coffee
the beauty, the nuance omg. this is art.
bellatrix prompt - @carters-coffee
yep jealous bella. trust me, im all yours mommy <3
sex with bellatrix would include - @onegayastronaut
so short but... sign. me. up.
luna lovegood
never leave - @/deactivated
luna smut is hard asf to come by and this is my favourite. it's so luna and the pain over her not knowing, not getting that closure about how you feel until this is an amazing rollercoaster.
she - @hunnypot-imagines
the beauty of falling in love with luna, through this majorly talented writing. ten out of fucking ten. i will not elaborate but there's also majorly good association in this imo.
silver berries and flickering fireflies - @duskgrangers
i love this fic so much. she's so herself and that is why we ✨ simp ✨ and the scene set just sounds so prettyy
how the potter girls react to you in lingerie - @pottersanime
luna + this title? yes please, ma'am i am simping.
would you still love me if i turned into a worm? - @minty-malfoy
put me in your pocket luna. im begging you.
dancing in the rain with luna - @/deactivated
only luna would get you a dress to go dancing in the rain and this is the stuff of blissful, fluffy dreams.
hugging her from behind - @pastanest
short and cute, do me a favour and read it :)
dating luna lovegood would go like - @glossymalfoy
life is NOT worth it if you don't read these cute little headcanons and imagine dating ravenclaw's baddest bitch.
linny hc - @bluebirdlinginthenest
like i said, who doesn't need good linny content?
cho chang
strawberry kisses - @pansydaisy
the only cho fic i've been able to find and it's SO WORTH IT. the cutest, it flows so well, and i absolutely love it. i need this with cho tbh.
fleur delacour
toutes les etoiles - @coffee--writes
im in love with fleur and this amazing writing. and for the first time since i started high school, my three years of taking french feel good for something.
being best friends with fleur would include - @harrypotter-imaginess
not romantic but actually so sweet pls. i want this friendship in my life so bad.
nymphadora tonks
dating nymphadora tonks would include - @imaginesforgirls
dating her + that warm little feeling of bliss that only HCs can give you
taking care of her after the war - @random-imagines-blog
this kind of hurts in that good ass way and i lovee it. they're simple hcs but i feel for tonks so much and then there's that warm lil feeling when you're the one to put her back together aand now my primary life goal is to help this woman heal.
───────── boys ─────────
harry potter
phosphenes - @minty-malfoy
ok shakespeare, the fuck?? this fic will never not get me right in the heart. the angst, holy fuck. and for once, the reader doesn't hurt harry and let draco walk all over them and it's just done so well. the transition from a toxic relationship to a sweet, loving one PLEASE. it's beautiful.
happy memories - @15-dogs
how does this manage to be so. smutty and fluffy at the same time? this is one of those short ones that has lived in my head, rent-free since i read it. and tbh any fic that includes expecto patronum is guaranteed to be good.
come back to me - @wondernimbus
right from the beginning, it's a mess of emotions both good and bad. that kind of good ass writing that hits you in the heart <3
making out with harry potter would include - @badfvith
read this title. done? now thank me later.
harry prompt - @thoseofgreatambition
harry x a sarcastic swooning bitch is an elite trope idc. short and sweet, i'm marrying this fic.
keep your eyes on the prize - @rowema-ravenclaw
first of all, showing harry up and second, pure fluff (and a little steam) right after. i also love how she writes harry in general because he's totally safe/in love with the relationship but still has that awkward lovable shyness and i just... *sighs*
always - @pansydaisy
uhm i will always love him and always reread this a thousand times so its a fit title + a good read.
late night studying - @lumosandnoxwriting
fuck studying, let his hand stay in my shirt. once again recommending fluffy bliss in the form of a short read that makes me feel things <3
would you still love me if i turned into a worm? - @minty-malfoy
he's so stupid. but he still loves you + this is from our resident perfectly talented writer so its a win.
cuddling after a rough quidditch practice - @badfvith
harry james potter is : b a b y
gryffindor's victory - @rowema-ravenclaw
make me gryffindors fucking cheerleader because HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT. AND THE WRITING IS IMMACULATE PLEASE. just read it, you won't regret it.
draco malfoy
silent treatment - @slytherinwh0re
andy's mad talented and this is just... insert a cheesy chefs kiss. unbelievably adorable but so fucking hot and an actually good smut plot (which is rare lmfao). remind me to give draco the silent treatment every time im upset.
rewards - @malfoysstilinski
so hot PLS. hype him up for the match and get your reward, bye. so good.
reading between the lines - @minty-malfoy
i've said this a thousand times but that's what happens when you've got a mad talented mutual BLESSING everyone with beauty like this. butterflies and warm feelings all around when i read this 💓
point of view - @draconisxcaput
its angst for hermione and fluff for you but overall ethereal writing. i am never going to recover from the pure talent that this is.
im not kidding im dying - @malfoysmatrioshka
i hate being sick with a passion but this... this would make it worth it.
hogwarts express - @/deactivated
draco fucking you because he knows harry's watching. the shit of legends and god is it hot.
draco laughing at you because you can't walk after sex - @glossymalfoy
*motions to the title* fluff with this loser 😌
the cheeseburger - @slytherinwh0re
really short read but this is one of those things i just. didn't know i needed. you're missing out and haven't even realised it if you haven't read about introducing him to cheeseburgers. and that ending is so funny/in character to me i fucking love it.
four am - @malfoysstilinski
domestic draco 🥺 but also sad draco 🥺 and then fluffy draco 🥺
hugging him from behind - @pastanest
real short and it'll brighten your day <3
would you still love me if i turned into a worm? - @minty-malfoy
how is it that this is so stupidly adorable. i love it 💘
ron weasley
heather - @hellounicorn
always making me cry with your fics i swearrr. this is a must-read. having someone but them not really being yours is a beautiful trope and this fic absolutely does it wonderful, poetic justice. your angst is addicting.
apple pie - @pregnant-piggy
ABSOLUTE DOMESTIC BLISS I AM IN LOVE. i don't even like kids or baking that much but this made me so soft. the whole cozy, heavenly vibes from this fic yes yes yes.
jealousy - @writeroutoftime
cliché jealousy turns friends to lovers and i am a sucker for it all over again <3
shaking and trembling - @ronsbadidea
if ron doesn't finger fuck me and then make a cheeky comment about it in class later then WHAT IS THE POINT :(
mixed signals - @iamthecabbage
i've always figured ron is this awkward idiot cutie with a crush and yea, this is it.
fred and george weasley
i love you, but you don't - @george-fabian-weasley
fred's a character i really don't read for often but goddamn. it's the saddest, most beautiful mix of rejection and pain and fred desperately caring but not in the way you want him to ─ an angsty masterpiece.
cockwarming george - @roonilwazlibimagines
because of this filthy gem, i one hundred thousand percent believe that he could make me cum without even fucking me and this is just... it's a good fucking read.
would you still love me if i turned into a worm? - @minty-malfoy
their responses are so wonderfully chaotic and adorable and GOD you're missing out if you haven't read these lil blurbs.
─
#harry potter x reader#hermione granger x reader#pansy parkinson x reader#luna lovegood x reader#ginny weasley x reader#draco malfoy x reader#fred weasley x reader#george weasley x reader#cho chang x reader#nymphadora tonks x reader#bellatrix lestrange x reader#ron weasley x reader#fleur delacour x reader#harry potter#fic recs#masterlist#smut#fluff#angst
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Its really funny and weird how, of all the european pagan mythologies, greek is the one white ppl know the most of by far.
Like, of course it makes sense, greco-romans were hailed as the peak of civilization by white european elites at least like, twice in history, but it’s still really wild like. We’ll know the names of every olympian and what exactly their deal is, know like 20 different random greek monsters who only appeared in like One Story,
but then u ask abt the british isles, site of a people who would eventually colonize the fucking world, and its like “uhhhhhh theres morrigan? Also some fairies. Is morrigan a fairy? I think there were some tree worshippers. Some dudes put blue paint on their body and had big shields i think?” and a book’s gonna claim there was an irish potato god and you’re going to believe them bcs you’ll be so wrapped up in the potato famine thing that you’ll forget potatos were IMPORTED FROM THE ANDES MOUNTAINS.
And then like folks will be familiar with like 4 norse gods maybe 5, know some words like asgard and ragnarok, but ask them who fenrir is and theyll be like “Is he important?”
Also if you ask them about germanic mythos they will draw a fucking blank bcs even tho the general public are familiar with at least a few germanic mythos things, we completely stripped out the germanic origins from them when we called them generic “fairy tales.” Same for france and the iberian penninsula i think. Also dont ask me which fairy tales come from where bcs i am a prime example of this, i do not fucking know, i just vaguely remember that they came from certain places and then spread from there.
Oh And absolutely FORGET about anything east of germany fucking forget about it. The slavic regions have a rich mythos and even ppl who are pretty knowledgable abt the stuff i said above won’t know shit about it, case in point, me! Go ahead! I know a bunch abt celtic stuff and norse stuff and a lill bit of german stuff, but ask me to bring up ONE slavic story! The only thing my brain is cookin up is that one about the lindwurm, and even that one i cant remember if its actually slavic!
Now Think abt how many white people claim heritage from places in europe that arent greece and italy. Think about how little those same ppl know abt their ancestor’s prechristian stories and beliefs. Im hispanic i know like one thing abt pre-christian spain and its that they had a funny word for fairies (i don’t even remember the name!), just as an example. Like isnt that fucking insane? You’d think a buncha colonizing douches competing with each other to take over the world would put a bit more effort into educating ppl abt the ancestral stories that set these guys apart from each other, but no, not really. And like dont get me wrong its not like this doesnt make sense. It does. The roman empire and later christianity overtook like all these myriad cultures years before colonialism and white supremacy was even a pipe dream, to say nothing about the internal strife that happened in the iberian peninsula and the british isles.
But at the same time, in recent years there’s been massive pushes to recover this lost culture (especially in those british isles places that arent england), and even with this effort, so much is unknown to a fuckton of people who, i repeat, claim heritage from these places. (In fact, one of those efforts probably set us back bcs it got caught up in bullshit ideology and mysticism and grabbed stuff from totally different people to support a bullshit point. Looking at you, nazis.) and it’s just kind of insane. Overall this is just a peak example to me of the hollowness and artificiality of the concept of whiteness. The master race can’t even remember their own ancestors, and ancient history had to be wiped away or made generic in order to support the notion that these people have something in common, and thus, something setting them apart from everyone else.
#mythology#race and ethnicity#this is a very broad strokes rant so i implore you to research the shit i casually referenced here fr yourself#also if ur wondering: this rant brought to you by a streamer who played the new god of war and didnt know who fenrir was#very amusing but also emblematic of a broader trend#YES THE POTATO GOD WAS AN ACTUAL THING THAT AN ACTUAL NEOPAGAN BOOK WROTE DOWN UNIRONICALLY#mainstream wicca has some Problems.#and for the record i think our understanding of greek mythology and religion is superficial#like yeah we know most of the stories but also only the biggest brain classicists comprehend the ideas and context of those stories#yeah its more than we know of Everyone Else but its still p lacking#like how many people know that Chaos is a person#how many ppl know abt all the cults and mysteries and how they had different takes on certain figures
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dance with me? - kaz brekker
request: uh hi! i don’t think you’re taking requests at this time but there is just something that i can’t get out of my head. it would be a kaz x reader and they go in a job at a ball. they have to dance together to blend in so that means touching. so reader lets him squeeze her hand or something to take his mind off his past and stuff but he like hurts the reader and then feels really bad about it or something. i hope you like this and i LIVE FOR YOUR WRITING. um thanks i guess🖤🖤
a/n: ballroom dancing scenes!!!! yes,,, im a whore for these and oh my god this is so long totally got away from me <3333
warnings: heist stuff, touch aversion? and one mention of a gun
this is not how you thought your night was going to go.
honestly, it wasn't how the night was meant to go. but heists almost never go the way they're meant to.
even so, when you woke up that morning the last place you expected to be was dancing in a ballroom with kaz brekker.
the heist was at one of the more upscale parties thrown by some wealthy mercher. the original plan had involved you, kaz, nina, and of course, inej. you and nina would come through the front doors of the party with some fake papers that kaz had been able to retrieve. the two of you would be dressed extravagantly, nina more so than you. nina was meant to take all of the attention of the night, so no one would notice as you tried to take the necklace right off of a woman's neck.
kaz would sneak in through another door, dressed as a guest, but much more conspicuously. he would be your backup on the floor, if he got the opportunity to do your job, he would take it. and inej was jumping around rooftops on lookout, just in case any other gangs got any ideas or any of the plan was leaked.
that's how things were meant to have worked out. in and out, not raising any alarms, and walking out half a million kruge richer.
halfway through the night though, as you kept your eyes on the target dancing around the room, kaz appeared at your side. you raised your eyebrows, looking at him over the cup of kvas in your hand. the two of you had agreed that as a group you'd pretend you didn't know each other. the less interaction, the less chance of suspicion.
kaz tilted his head towards nina. you turned your attention to the girl in the pretty red dress. she was surrounded by people wanting to touch her, talk to her, just like she had been the rest of the night. you looked back at kaz with a confused look on your face. 'what about her' you tried to relay with your eyes.
he lifted his arms and motioned to one tall man in a black and white suit, watching her. you tried not to linger too much on kaz's ungloved hands but you did anyway. but then you noticed the very distinct outline of a gun strapped to the man's thigh.
you sucked in a breath and turned to kaz in panic. this party was strictly no weapons. you had a small knife tucked into your corset but you knew that there was no way to win a gunfight with a knife. and if that man was armed it meant he wasn't alone. and that he meant trouble. and he was looking in your direction. there was no way the two of you would be able to get that necklace now.
kaz seemed to search for something in your eyes. he had his scheming face on, as jesper had dubbed it. you could tell the moment he made a decision one what to do next because he physically grimaced.
slowly, and with evident hesitation, kaz lifted up his hand in an inviting gesture. your eyes furrowed in confusion and stared at his pale hand. he nudged it toward you and whispered "c'mon" under his breath.
you straightened our back and placed your hands firmly on your hips, "what exactly are you asking me to do."
he rolled his eyes in annoyance, but you knew him well enough to notice the way his hand was shaking. he was nervous. he was panicking.
"i'm asking you to dance with me. now take my hand. now."
he didn't wait for you to take in what he was saying and he grabbed your hand from your hip. he dragged you onto the dance floor, you only had a couple of seconds to pull up your heavy dress before tripping on it.
kaz placed a hand on your dressed hip. you rested your hand on his shoulder. he lifted your joined hands and pulled you a little bit closer.
and then he started to dance.
correction, he started leading you in a dance.
for a couple of seconds you were so shocked, by the feeling of kaz's hand in yours, by the closeness of your bodies, by the fact that the two of you were now dancing in a room full of the wealthy elite, that you could almost ignore the way kaz's entire body was trembling.
you pulled your body away from his slightly when you noticed, giving him more room but not letting go of his hand, not letting the act drop and calling unwanted attention to yourselves.
"kaz" you whispered and squeezed his hand gently. he finally looked you in the eyes and your heart almost shattered at the look in his eyes. you gave his hand another squeeze and tilted your head to the side, "are you um are you okay?"
he let out a shaky breath. he squeezed your hand back quickly, his face showed the slightest amount of relief at the motion. you furrowed your brows and gave his hand another squeeze, and he mimicked your motion. you raked your eyes up and down his body and his trembling had slightly stopped.
"squeeze" you whispered and looked around the rest of the ballroom.
"what?" you heard him say.
"just squeeze my hand. if it'll help" you whisper shouted at him. your emberassment wouldn't let you look in his direction.
but you felt him start to slowly squeeze your joined hands. his strength surprised you and within a few seconds, he was full-on squeezing your hand. you bit the inside of your cheek to stop a pained whimper from leaving your lips.
you could tell the motion was helping kaz calm down, helping him focus on something else other than the closeness of the two of you.
he led you around the room in dance for a couple of more minutes, the two fo you didn't say anything. kaz focused on not focusing on you. and you focused on kaz's tight ass grip.
he was a good dancer. better than you expected him to be. his grip on your thigh was feather-light, but he didn't falter in his direction and didn't lose his lead at any moment. it was easy for you to slip into this act. you had to stop yourself from leaning your head onto his shoulder, from letting yourself slip into the fantasy of being a princess with a handsome, non-murderous, prince. this was dirty hands himself not prince charming. regardless, you wanted to ask him where he had learned to dance like that.
then, inej, sneaky as she is, appeared at your side holding a very familiar ruby necklace. "got it" she grinned and then slipped away before you could get a word in.
then, as you turned to say something to kaz, nina showed up on the opposite side of the two of you. her attention switched to your joined hands and smirked, and then she looked at kaz and nudged her head towards the exit. "uh i recommend we get going guys, inej isn't as skilled at stealing as you two so we better get out of here. quick."
she started prancing out the door and kaz started dragging you away, following behind nina. you looked around and noticed a couple of scary-looking men were facing you and kaz. he let go of your hand as you quicken your pace and then all four of you were running down the streets. anything to get as far away from that place as possible before guns started going off.
a couple of blocks later all four of you stopped in an ally to catch your breath. kaz was rubbing his bad leg, tenderly. nina was laughing with inej, clearly, the two of them were pumped up with adrenaline.
you, on other hand, were shaking your hand to relieve some of the soreness you were starting to feel. you did it close to your body so the others wouldn't notice but of course, the professional criminals who stayed alive by noticing noticed.
"y/n, what happened to your hand?" nina asked, her smile being playful.
at this, kaz's head snapped your way from where he was looking. his eyes darted between your face and your hand.
you looked away and gave nina a very casual smile, "nothing, i'm good. i hit it on a wall or something when we were running here. just a little sore. now how about we see that necklace inej?"
after a couple of minutes of walking and joking around with the girls, bragging about the beautiful gems, they walked ahead of you and kaz.
your steps lined up with his, so when he slowed down slightly, conveniently out of ear range of nina and inej, you slowed down too.
you waited for him to speak. but were still shocked when he said, "i'm sorry"
you didn't look at him, just continued walking forward. "you have nothing to be sorry for kaz. we both did what we had to do to make sure we all got out of there alive. no harm no foul."
he scoffed a little, "saints you're starting to sound like me." you smiled slightly at that and glanced his way to find him already looking at you, knowing it was true. he continued on there was harm, is your hand okay?"
you nodded your head, "yeah. i'm all good, genuinely. but now i know you probably have a very solid handshake."
he chuckled and then got very serious. he looked you in the eyes as the two of you walked, "thank you. i needed that. i probably would have passed out if it weren't for you." the last words were whispered. you knew how hard it was for kaz to admit weakness so you understood.
"anything i can do to help", you smiled, "plus i got a free dance out of it. you are one good dancer dirtyhands." you teased him.
and surprisingly he teased right back, "maybe we could do it again sometime then?"
#Kaz Brekker#kaz brekker x reader#kaz brekker x you#kaz brekker imagine#six of crows imagine#six of crows#shadow and bone#shadow and bone imagine#leigh bardugo#Grishaverse#grisha fic#grisha#nina zenik#inej ghafa
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omg I just realized ur requests are open im stupid HAHAHA
anyway 🚶♀️ could I request hajime, nagito, and sayori with an S/O who's basically junko reincarnated? like, basically, their S/O has different personalities bc they get bored of themselves so easily, clothes are revealing, etc. yk
mwa /p
Ignore the fact im writing this while in the middle of changing everything about my blog. Also! I will not be mentioning Junko as much but only mentioning some of her attributes. Also this will be hcs! This is actually like the longest post Ive made-
Also im sorry for being inactive 😭 anyways here we goo!!!
Hajime, Nagito and Sayori with a S/O that's a lot like Junko!
Hajime my favorite Orange<33
At first when meeting you (pre dating) he didn't expect you to be so.. how do I put this? Uh like have such revealing clothes in a elite school like this (preferably non killing game au) He honestly found the fact that your just like so sad because you probably got a bad grade and your like "Oh well! I think im going to go get -insert favorite expensive treat-"
If you guys never got paired up and you were just a funny background person in his life until you dated he probably didn't notice his feelings until he found you making him smile everyday with a little tingle in his stomach BUT if you did end up being like a friendly person with him time to time where you sometimes chatted and did get partnered up in classes lets just say you guys had that type of friendship where you were like "I hate you so f-ing much" AS A JOKE- Everyone knew you guys liked each other and i feel that Junko wouldn't say to someone that they like em with one of those cheesy confessions because I think that she doesn't actually know what she feels about her relationships with people. You guys also had a platonic relationship at first but everyone else knew it secretly wasn't platonic! But either way you guys end up chatting. And its probably those late nights when he has those butterfly's in his stomach going crazy when your messaging or making plans or on a call. Its those times that he knows that he loves you and that he wants to have a relationship with you. He wants to have a future with you and all of your crazy personality's. ANYWHO TIME FOR THE DATING PART!!! When your wearing really revealing stuff he'd probably either A. Get very flustered and protective OR B. get very angry and be a guard dog at whoever dares to look at you too long in a weird way. Either way hes most likely very flustered if you just hold his hand when wearing revealing things Adding on to when you were just friends and you where failing your test and you became gloomy but then like "Anywho!" Yeah now that your dating and if your in a trance about "God Im so boring" He'd probably give you a lot of comfort and you guys have a honest life to life chat.
Here's a Semi-Scenario
-Chilling on the couch perferably you laying your head in his lap on your phone- "God life is so boring.. There's nothing good anymore!-" You then shift towards him making him flustered. "Although you make you slightly more enjoyable"
Nagito
Pre-dating he kinda like did his awkward smile and rubbed the back of his head while you said random funny stupid stuff-
Due to his luck there's no way in hell you didnt get paired up. I mean what do you expect 🤨 his luck not pairing him up with the soon to be love of his life to make y'all fall deeply inlove? Your relationship before or while dating is always him teasing you and you bossing him around. Kinda cute. When he finds out he has a crush hes definitely laying on his bed thinking "but why would someone as amazing as them want to date me! Or even hangout with such a useless being such as me…" If you wear revealing things (or something like Junko was wearing when she was in the car with Murkuro and tried to stab her…) and make him go shopping you'd probably grab his hand and drag him to the next store and everyone would think your dating before its official. He would also be carrying the bags. I mean we gotta put him to work!!! he finds all your personalities and your changes very hopeful. Something with like every time you change your personality you rid yourself of despair. Or some dumb thing. Your first unofficial kiss was probably on his like forehead or on the lips. Even before you where dating. You just like gave him a little peck to show your thankful for the dumbshit he does with you. DATING TIME!!! MWHAHAHAHAHA He would most likely say "Its pretty cold out dont you wanna cover up abit?" and you'd respond with "Nah i dont do cold. I'd rather be sexy" heres something he'd say while your bitching about how boring you are!!
he'd gently run his fingers threw your hair while your huddled up in his jacket on a park bench. "You shouldn't say this about yourself it fills you with despair. And that's not very hopeful love.""I know! But like still. Dont you get tired of all of my dumbshit?" You reply." I love you for who you are and thats that." Then some dumbass kid runs up to you. "hey uhm! Your kinda sitting on me and my friends ben-" "FUCK OFF IM HAVING A MOMENT WITH MY BOYFRIEND"
Sayori
Mwah heres a extra because i love you guys sm.
Okay so lets say your not neighbors and your in the same classes. And maybe lets also say shes handing out flyers for the festival! Out side of your classroom… You guys where Semi- friends so all good! And you gave her a gentle smile as you walked by!! That won her over. The whole club pampered her with "Oo! Sayori has a crushhh" or "When do we get to meet them?" Monika probably told them to chill if Sayori got too shy. She found you cool and bold! And in English when you wrote that essay ahout yourself she found all your personalities really cute and how you described them!! -insert love stuff- She could probably talk to you for hours at a time even if you already finished the assigned project! I dont have many ideas for dating hcs so heres her Introducing you to the club while dating!!
"y/n cmon!! They're really nice!!!" Sayori reassured you. You decided you'd be a brat in that moment. Why? Because your bored!! "finee" She ran you into the club for you to see them practically having a tea Party. "Welcome Y/N! Sayori hasnt stopped talking about you. Care for a Cupcake? Natsuki makes the best ones ever!" Monika greeted you."Hey!…You don't have to say that!!" Natsuki blushed at Monikas comment. Its a chaotic club and you and Sayori enjoyed it together.
This is probably the longest ive ever written 😭
Anywho! I hope you enjoy it!!
#danganronpa#ddlc x reader#danganronpa headcanons#danganronpa x reader#danganronpa 2#nagito x reader#sayori#ddlc plus
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